


I Will Help You Through This

by spidermanstan



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Comfort/Angst, Crying, Gen, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Nightmares, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, References to Depression, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Vomiting, god im so bad at tags lmao
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-25
Updated: 2018-07-30
Packaged: 2019-06-16 04:51:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,264
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15429405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spidermanstan/pseuds/spidermanstan
Summary: “I.. I think I’m… getting sick..” Peter mumbled into Tony’s chest as Tony sat them both down on his king sized bed, his voice hoarse from all the crying. Tony felt his forehead, then his cheeks, with the back of his hand.“You don’t feel warm.” Tony observed, frowning. He looked up towards the ceiling. “Fri?”“Mr. Parker isn’t running a fever, and my scans aren’t detecting any kind of virus or ailment.” The AI replied. A few tears slipped from Peter's eyes down his cheeks.“Then why do I always feel so awful?”OrIn which Peter Parker confides in Tony Stark about the dark thoughts he's been having, and Tony is there to comfort him and listen.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> so i was going through a depressive episode yesterday and ended up getting very sad and drunk last night and this is what came out of it lmao. i guess me getting sa drunk by myself at home means i project my feelings into my favourite characters, but hey we got a fic out of it so i'm breaking even i guess jkhgdsfkj. i've cleaned it up a a bit so it's readable and so it makes some kind of sense, and i hope you enjoy!

“Boss?” Tony lifted his head out of modifying his latest Iron Man helmet when Friday addressed him. “Mr. Parker appears to be in distress.” She informed him. Tony put down the helmet and quickly made his way to the elevator.

“What time is it?” Tony asked as the elevator shot up to Peter’s floor. He’d been so engrossed in his work he’d lost track of time. Not uncommon for him.

“3:56 am.” Friday replied. Tony nodded to himself as the doors opened and he rushed to Peter’s room. Stopping in front of Peter’s door, he knocked twice and waited, to give Peter a chance to say if he didn’t want Tony in his room. After a moment of no reply, Tony slowly pushed the door open and stepped into Peter’s dark room.

In the dim light Tony could see Peter sitting upright in his bed, head and hands buried in his knees. He was shaking, and Tony could hear Peter whimpering softly into his hands. He was rocking some serious bed head and his coveres had been kicked to the floor. Tony made a raising motion with two fingers and the lights brightened just enough so Tony would be able to clearly make out Peter’s face.

“Peter?” Tony asked cautiously as he slowly made his way over to the teen. Peter’s only reply was a staggering inhale as if he was trying to get control of his breathing, and a strangled sob. “Pete?” Tony asked again, a bit louder this time as he stepped over the discarded blankets. “I’m gonna sit on your bed, okay?” He warned once he reached the bed, easing onto it carefully. Tony reached out gingerly and placed his hand on Peter’s shoulder, relaxing slightly when Peter grabbed onto his wrist.

They stayed like that for a while, Tony sitting across from Peter, rubbing his shoulder with his thumb as Peter continued to grip his wrist forcefully. Peter had started hyperventilating at one point, and thought he’d tried to follow the breathing exercises Tony would whisper to him, he could not get his breathing under control. Tony decided to give up on those for the time being, opting instead for rubbing Peter’s knee with his other hand, something Pepper’s done for him many times before.

A couple of minutes later, Peter had finally seemed to tire himself out, Tony pulling him into his chest for a hug. Peter’s breathing was still irregular and he was hiccuping, and Tony knew what was going to happen. The moment he felt Peter go rigged against his side, he hauled the teen to the bathroom where he promptly lost his late dinner from the night before.

The ordeal prompted Peter st stary crying once again, retching between exhausted sobbing. Tony stayed knelt behind him, rubbing his back soothingly and helping Peter stay upright. It took a while, but soon Peter was able to step away from the toilet, Tony embracing the small teen once again.

“You wanna come to my room, Pete?” Tony asked softly. All Tony needed was that nod against his chest before he was lifting Peter up in his arms, walking them up to his room. Peter was still sniffling every so often, but he’d calmed down quite a bit from when Tony had first entered his room.

“I.. I think I’m… getting sick..” Peter mumbled into Tony’s chest as Tony sat them both down on his king sized bed, his voice hoarse from all the crying and vomiting. Tony maneuvered himself until he could lay Peter down on his bed, and felt his forehead, then his cheeks, with the back of his hand.

“You don’t feel warm.” Tony observed, frowning. He looked up towards the ceiling. “Fri?”

“Mr. Parker isn’t running a fever, and my scans aren’t detecting any kind of virus or ailment.” The AI replied.  Peter slowly sat himself up on Tony’s bed, crossing his legs as he sat facing his mentor. A few tears slipped from his eyes down his cheeks.

“Then why do I always feel so awful?” Peter asked, breaking. He leaned into Tony once again as he cried silently, Tony instantly wrapping his hands around his kid. “I just… Feel so, so tired all the time, and everything hurts, Mr. Stark, I just-” Peter inhaled deeply, not wanting to fall into hysterics once again. “I just don’t wanna do… This.. anymore.”

“You don’t wanna be Spider-Man anymore?” Tony asked. Peter took another deep, uneven breath.

“I just don’t wanna do anything anymore.” Peter whimpered into Tony’s chest. Tony nodded, rubbing Peter’s back.

“How long have you been feeling this way, Pete?” Tony asked calmly, knowing that the last thing the kid needed right now was him freaking out too.

“I don’t… For a few weeks, I guess..” Peter replied in a small voice. Tony nodded.

“Does your aunt know you’ve been feeling like this?” Tony asked. He felt Peter shake his head against his chest.

“I don’t wanna… I don’t wanna worry her..” Peter replied after a moment. Tony nodded again, placing one hand behind Peter’s head and keeping him close. 

“I’ve been through this too, kid.” Tony confided. “I’ve been through it a lot. I know how you’re feeling.” Peter sniffled against Tony, leaning into his chest more heavily. 

“I’m scared.” Peter whispered. “Of myself.” It was at this point that Tony just pulled the kid into his lap, holding him tightly to his chest.

“I’ll keep you safe Pete.” Tony whispered back. “And so will that amazing, understanding aunt of yours.” Peter looked up at Tony, and Tony smiled back down at him. “And so will your guy in the chair. And your other, much scarier friend.” Tony saw the ghost of a smile appear on Peter’s lips, and at that sight gave him a quick squeeze and a quick kiss to the top of his head. 

“Pete I want you to remember you have people in your life who love you and care about you. So much.” He wiped another tear from Peter’s eye as it began to fall. “But you’ve gotta let us know what’s going on so we can help you okay? Because we’re not gonna judge you or think any less of you. We all want you to be happy and feel safe, alright?” Peter nodded shyly.

“I love you, Mr. Stark.” Peter murmured, another tear slipping down his face. Tony rested his head on top of Peter’s knowingly.

“I love you too kid, I really do.” He paused. “You’ll get through this, Pete. You’ll be okay.” 

They sat like that for many moments more, comfortable in each other’s presence. At some point Tony guided a half asleep Peter to lie down on the bed, Peter curled up next to Tony with his head on his mentor’s chest and Tony playing absentmindedly with his chocolate brown hair.

A few minutes later, Friday dimmed the lights in the large bedroom til they were off, as both Tony and Peter had fallen into the best sleep either of them have had in weeks.   


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I’m just scared and I know know what’s wrong with me.” Peter sobbed, Mr. Stark nodding and still rubbing Peter’s back.
> 
> “Nothing’s wrong with you kid.” He replied. “You wanna know what I think?” He then asked. Peter looked up, nodding tearfully. “Sounds like you’re just depressed, bud.” Mr. Stark explained, wearing a sad smile. “But the good thing about that, is that it’s gonna pass.”
> 
> Or
> 
> In which Tony gives Peter some much needed reassurance and advice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you asked for it and here it is, part two!! fair warning, i wrote this instead of sleeping last night and was maybe a little drunk, so again, not my best work. but i hope you enjoy reading it!

When Peter woke up the next morning, he was alone.

He’d woken up slowly, his body feeling achy and weighed down, the same way it would if he’d been out on a particularly bad patrol the night before. But he knew he hadn’t been, because he’d come up the the Avengers compound for the weekend. He squeezed his eyes closed tighter, and a small groan escaped his lips when he noticed the faint taste of vomit still lingering on his tongue.

Reluctantly, Peter opened his eyes. He had to blink a few times and rub the crust out of his eyes, his whole face feeling tight and too dry. He turned his head to the side, noticing golden light streaming into the room that was not his own. 

Seemingly all at one, the memories of what events took place the night before came flooding back to him.

Of trying, really trying this time to fall asleep, of the horrible yet all too familiar nightmare that followed. Of waking up crying and shaking, unable to breath because it was all too much.

Of Mr. Stark, comforting him. 

Of him telling Mr. Stark about what had been going on.

No. No, no he didn’t do that part, did he?

Shit.

Cautiously, he sat himself up in the bed,  _ Mr. Stark’s freaking bed _ , he might add _. _ The soft sheets pooled around his waist as he did so, the room feeling slightly cool. The faint smell of hot food filled the air, and Peter realized for the first time how hungry he was. Probably because he had thrown up his dinner the night before, not like he had eaten much at dinner to begin with. 

Peter pulled the covers off of himself, hesitant to leave the warmth they provided, and slowly inched his way to the edge of Mr. Stark’s bed. He sat there for a moment, letting his feet dangle in the air as he thought about the night before. He felt like he had just gone three rounds with the Hulk, sure, but he felt so well rested and… He felt lighter, too. His limbs may have felt heavy, but for the first time in a while, his heart didn’t. At least not as much as it had been.

Peter slid off the bed and slowly followed the scent of food to the kitchen.

Crossing the threshold to the kitchen/dining room area, Peter was greeted by Mr. Stark, reaching into the oven to retrieve whatever Peter was smelling. He was wearing a plain white tee shirt and grey sweatpants, and when he pulled whatever he was baking out of the oven, Peter could see he had pink oven mitts protecting his hands. Tony set the food down on the countertop, smiling softly when he looked over his shoulder to see Peter. Peter smiled too, noticing the Iron Man apron his mentor was wearing when he turned fully to face him.

“You sleep well?” Tony asked, taking off the oven mitts and setting them down on the counter next to the cooling food. Peter nodded, now walking into the kitchen.

“I did, actually. Yeah..” Peter admitted, taking a seat at the island counter of the kitchen. Mr. Stark’s smile widened at his answer.

“Seems like it.” Tony beamed. Peter stifled a yawn, looking out the large windows of the compound. “It’s almost seven.”

“Seven a.m.?” Peter asked, suddenly feeling disoriented. Mr. Stark shook his head.

“P.m. You were really out for the count, kiddo.” Peter rubbed his face with his hands, some things starting to make more sense. He’d been confused as to why the sunlight was seemingly rising in the west instead of the east, but honestly Peter wouldn’t be surprised if the entire compound was rigged to do a 180 at the push of a button. If Peter has learned anything over the past year it’s that when you’re dealing with Tony Stark pretty much any kind of weird technological feat is possible.

“You just let me sleep all day?” Peter asked, the sounds of Mr. Stark rummaging through the kitchen cupboards for plates and utensils pulling him away from his compound carousel fantasy. Mr. Stark nodded as he pulled a large serving spoon from a drawer.

“After the night you had last night, I figured you needed it.” He set two plates and two forks in front of Peter on the island, along with the serving spoon. He moved the glass baking dish in front of Peter as well. “I’m guessing that wasn’t your first time at the rodeo, eh?” Mr. Stark asked, picking up the serving spoon and pointing to the food with it. “Baked mac and cheese, you want some?” Peter nodded and watched intently as Mr. Stark put a portion on each plate, sliding the larger one towards Peter. He accepted the food wordlessly.

“Wow,” Peter blurted out after his first forkful, mouth still half full, “this is really good!” Mr. Stark smiled at the compliment, eating a forkful as well.

“You’ll have to thank Rhodey when he gets home, kid. It’s his recipe.” That was the end of their conversation for a while, both of them opting instead to shovel their food into their mouths, enveloped in a comfortable silence. Once Peter finished off his plate, Mr. Stark wordlessly filled it again with another hearty helping of food, which Peter finished around the same time Mr. Stark polished off his first plate.

“Thank you, Mr. Stark.” Peter murmured as he collected both plates and put them in the sink when Peter indicated he was full for now. “For last night, too.” Mr. Stark nodded, pulling a roll of tin foil out of a drawer and covering the baking dish with a sheet. He put the roll back in its place and set the mac and cheese to the side. After clearing everything off the island, Mr. Stark stood opposite Peter, leaning forward and propped up on his elbows. His face grew softer and concerned.

“Can we talk about last night?” Mr. Stark asked, calmly. “You were saying some pretty heavy stuff, kiddo.” Peter bit the inside of his lip. “Only if you’re ready thought, Peter.” Mr. Stark was quick to add. “We don’t have to talk about it right now, I just wanna make sure you’re okay.” Peter shifted in his seat, trying to find the right words to start off with.

“I just… I think I might be coming down with something..” Peter mumbled. Mr. Stark pursed his lips.

“You were sayin’ that last night too, kid.” Mr. Stark informed Peter.

“Oh.” Was all Peter replied. Mr. Stark smoothly made his way around the island ‘til he was next to Peter, and placed the back of his calloused hand on Peter’s neck, cheek and forehead, each touch lasting no more than two seconds.

“You still don’t feel warm, Pete.” Mr. Stark sat down on the stool next to him, his hand resting comfortably on Peter’s shoulder. “What kind of ‘something’ do you think you’re coming down with?” Peter took a moment to think before answering.

“I just… I don’t know. I just feel sick all the time.” Peter explained, speaking slowly. “I barely have an appetite anymore, I’m always tired, I don’t ever wanna do anything, sometimes I just feel really…” Peter paused, trying to think of the right word to describe what he was talking about. “Foreign in my own body I guess.” He met Mr. Stark’s concerned gaze. “Almost like I shouldn’t be in it. Like it doesn’t belong to me.” Mr. Stark nodded as Peter kept speaking.

“Nothing I do is right anymore… I go out on patrol but every time I put on the suit I get so.. Angry. I get angry with the people doing bad things but I get angry at myself, too. Because I feel like whatever I do, it’s never enough.” Peter could feel hot tears start to well up in his eyes as his speech got faster. “There’s always another bad guy, they just never stop, and I know that they’re never gonna stop, I’m just one kid I can’t stop them…” He swiped quickly at his eye when he felt a tear spill over. “My body hurts, all the time, for no reason and I feel like I’m going crazy.” Mr. Stark nodded again, bringing his hand up to rub the back of Peter’s head.

“And I must be getting sick because if there’s nothing physically wrong with me then I’m just going crazy, and Mr. Stark —” A single sob escaped Peter as he continued looking up at his mentor. “It just feels like I’m going crazy and I can’t trust myself anymore _ and I’m scared _ .” Peter let Mr. Stark pull him into a hug, feeling the older man’s heartbeat as he pressed his head into his chest. He felt Mr. Stark rubbing his back as tears continued to fall, along with an uneven breath every now and again.

“You’re not going crazy, Pete, I know it kinda feels like you are, but you’re not.” Mr. Stark whispered into Peter’s soft hair. Mr. Stark pulled away, looking down at Peter. “Let’s go sit on the couch, yeah?” Peter nodded, and the two of them made their way to the common area, Mr. Stark keeping one arm wrapped around Peter. They sat down on the large plush couch, Peter immediately curling into Mr. Stark for comfort.

“I’m just scared and I know know what’s wrong with me.” Peter sobbed, Mr. Stark nodding and still rubbing Peter’s back.

“Nothing’s wrong with you kid.” He replied. “You wanna know what I think?” He then asked. Peter looked up, nodding tearfully. “Sounds like you’re just depressed, bud.” Mr. Stark explained, wearing a sad smile. “But the good thing about that, is that it’s gonna pass.”

“How do you know?” Peter asked, sniffling. 

“You said this started a couple weeks ago, yeah? Last night?” Peter nodded. “We went to visit your parents with your aunt a few weeks ago Pete. Remember?” Peter sniffled again, wracking his brain. The memory did emerge after a moment of digging, but all the intense emotions he’d been feeling as of late had clouded it. 

“It’s never been this bad, thought..” Peter observed, his voice small. Mr. Stark hugged him closer.

“You’ve never had so much more added stress, kid.” Mr. Stark almost chuckled, as if it was obvious. “You’re getting ready to graduate high school, you’re cleaning up crime in Queens, you’re training to become an Avenger. Of course this kind of stuff is gonna be a lot more intense.” Peter buried his face into Mr. Stark’s chest again.

“How do I make it stop?” He asked. “How do I go back to normal?” Mr. Stark began patting Peter’s back, almost like he was burping a baby. Peter would never admit it, but it was very soothing.

“The shitty news is for the most part you’ve just gotta let yourself feel it.” He explained. “But reaching out to the people you love helps a lot, kid. Trust me,” His hand went still on Peter’s back, “it’s so much harder going through this alone, kid. And I want you to know you don’t have to.” Peter sat up, sitting next to Mr. Stark on the couch. Mr. Stark sat up straight and turned to face Peter, wiping the tears off his cheeks with both of his hands, and keeping them there for a moment. “I know it’s hard, Pete. But I’m gonna help you through this, okay? Scouts honour.” Peter smiled shyly, and Mr. Stark moved his hands down to the teen’s shoulders.

“But you’ve gotta promise me some things too, okay Peter?” Mr. Stark continued. “Just because you were saying some concerning stuff last night.” Peter nodded. “You’ve gotta promise me that you’re not gonna go anywhere without telling either your aunt or myself, and if you ever feel like you can’t keep yourself safe you’re gonna call one of us right away, yeah?” Peter nodded again.

“Scouts honour.” He replied. Tony pulled him into a bear hug, sighing against his hair.

“You know I love you, right kid?” Mr. Stark asked as Peter hugged back, just as tight. “Because I really love you Peter, I do.”

“I love you too.” Peter replied. “But you’re kinda crushing me here, Mr. Stark.” Mr. Stark laughed and released Peter from the hug. He playfully messed up Peter’s already disheveled hair.

“Now, what do you say to a movie marathon?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope this wraps up the fic nicely ://
> 
> and hey, if it did, or if it didn't, let me know!! comment!!!
> 
> if you liked it, comment!!
> 
> if you hated it (or if you have an idea on how you think i should've written this) comment too!!!
> 
> i just love getting comments they make me very happy and i love all of them!!!
> 
> even the key smashes!!! just comment literally anything and you'll make my day lmao
> 
> and thanks for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> so i've decided i might try to write a part two? i have a bunch of drunk notes from myself about points i wanted in this fic but i guess i ended up forgetting to add them in lmao, so imma try to write a part two of Tony talking with Peter the next morning and trying to give him further support idk. but i'm not gonna post this if ppl don't comment bc i've gotta know that someone wants a part two or else there's no point in writing it.
> 
> so if you want more, comment.
> 
> even if you don't want more you should still comment.
> 
> comment literally anything you want.
> 
> i just love getting comments lmao.


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